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Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Second World War Begins [Recaps]

• Jun 29, 2010 from gawker(Gawker) in Entertainment
  On last night's wander into the black forests of the Garden State, we saw a sad woman at a crossroads. We saw an angry woman coming undone. We saw women who were trying to be better, but failing.This was something of a transitional episode. We were setting the scene for what's to come in one week's time, an epic blowdown of magisterial proportions. It will involve shrieking and women falling down and hyperventilating, and, like any true blowdown, the police. But for now, there is only this. The waiting. The anxious rumbles before the quake. The chicken skin-yellow sky of the terrible storm swirling our way. Let's stand in the eerie quiet and see what we can see.
  Ah yes, what's that there, can you make it out? It's the arched roofs and gilded doors of a very fancy shoppe, an emporium perhaps. Aha! It's the Posche store, where one can get a very "classful" Posche automobile. The steering wheel is conveniently located in the middle, so you can drive in England and the US and A. Do you like windshield wipers? Then you will love windshield cats, who lick all the water off, eventually. They live in the engine and eat spark plugs. A Posche is the finest off-brand luxury combustion device since the Marseillesdees, a French vehicle that runs on orange peels and sour wine. Who runs such a fancy dealership? Why Kim X, of course, a woman with a wispy white dead dandelion tuft of hair and a sharp, ambitious face. While she does bask often in the riches that the Posche dealership affords her, she wants more. She wants in with the Housewives, so very very desperately. She wants in so badly that she's been playing both sides of the field. She cozies up to Jacqueline, Teresa & Co. and cackles up to the notorious bug-witch Danielle. Kim X. is an amateur, so you'll forgive her for forgetting that she is being filmed by television cameras, which steal your essence and then rebroadcast it into America's homes. She does seem to forget that, so she thinks it's totally cool to just be completely two-faced. Oh Kim X. Ohhhh Kim.
  So first in this episode she drove her Posche Flamingo coupe over to a restaurant where Jacqueline and Teresa were eating. "Wait, is that centimeters or inches," Teresa was grumbling, while Jacqueline held a ruler to her forehead. Jacqueline frowned, "It's centimeters, honey." Teresa was about to throw a small fit but then she looked up and saw Kim X. coming, so she slapped the ruler out of Jacqueline's hand, hard, and rose to say hello to Kim X. Jacqueline sulked and kissed her boo-boo and searched the table for her sippy-cup. Kim X folded her long Jack Skellington limbs into her chair and, as the air conditioning blew parts of her hair off, wasted wishes, she told them about a big event she was planning. See Posche not only sells various wheeled machines, they also sell clothing. Very interesting, bold swaths of cloth that the ladies of Franklin Lakes use to lash around their murderous frames in various creative ways. When Kim X. gets a new shipment of cloth from the mysterious, ghostly old steamer ship that appears out of the mist and docks at Elizabeth on the same day every year, she throws a fashion show party to get all the girls interested. (She needs desperately to sell as many of the clothes as possible, if only to make the terrifying trip into the ship's metal belly worth it, with the screaming and moaning she hears from down dark, dripping corridors and the lone, withered old man with no eyes who greets her when she raps three times on the ship's door.) It's quite a big event held at one of North-Central New Jersey's 36,000 event spaces, and all the ladies in town want to come. This year, Kim X. would really like it if Jacqueline and Teresa would go.
  But they, of course, are not so sure. See, Kim X. is friends with Danielle and Danielle will probably be at the fashion show. Jacqueline is scared. Twice a week she's been talking with that nice lady, Dr. Karen, whose office is pleasant and has lots of bright, soft toys that she can play with. One day Dr. Karen leaned in close to Jacqui and said in her soothing ladyvoice, "Jacqueline honey, why don't you tell me about these pictures that you drew?" and she pointed to all the pictures that Jacqueline had drawn in art class, of a fissure-thin raven woman with bug eyes and red (blood?) spewing from her mouth, a thick black crayon halo surrounding her. And, after having been too scared to tell her for weeks, Jacqueline finally said to Dr. Karen, in a quiet voice, "That's the mean lady Danielle..." And Dr. Karen took in a quick breath, something was wrong. But then the moment passed and Dr. Karen was calm again, comforting again. "I see. And did this Danielle... Did she... hurt you, Jacqueline?" And Jacqueline nodded, squeezing her favorite Puffalump tighter. "She hurts everyone." And, when Jacqueline was sitting in the waiting room with Teresa while Caroline had grownup talk with Dr. Karen, she could hear from behind the closed door Dr. Karen saying...

Video: War is a Racket by Smedley Butler

• Jul 15, 2010 from themountainsage(Mountain Sage)
  Thanks to Skyagunsta for posting the link.
  As our government contemplates how to lower the deficit by slashing benefits for the average citizen, it is time for us to look at the value of war and the huge military spending that is never cut it seems. Is it really necessary for the U.S. to spend 41% of the worlds military budget?
  He joined the Marine Corps when the Spanish American War broke out, earned the Brevette Medal during the Boxer Rebellion in China, saw action in Central America, and in France during World War I was promoted to Major General. Smedley Butler served his country for 34 years, yet he spoke against American armed intervention into the affairs of sovereign nations.
  The video is an actor playing the part of Smedley Butler and frankly its pretty bad, BUT, the speech was real and you can find the transcript below:
  
  War Is A Racket
  A speech delivered in 1933, by Major General Smedley Butler, USMC.
  Smedley Butler
  WAR is a racket. It always has been
  It is possibly the oldest, easily the most profitable, surely the most vicious. It is the only one international in scope. It is the only one in which the profits are reckoned in dollars and the losses in lives.
  A racket is best described, I believe, as something that is not what it seems to the majority of the people. Only a small inside group knows what it is about. It is conducted for the benefit of the very few, at the expense of the very many. Out of war a few people make huge fortunes.
  In the World War [I] a mere handful garnered the profits of the conflict. At least 21,000 new millionaires and billionaires were made in the United States during the World War. That many admitted their huge blood gains in their income tax returns. How many other war millionaires falsified their tax returns no one knows.
  How many of these war millionaires shouldered a rifle? How many of them dug a trench? How many of them knew what it meant to go hungry in a rat-infested dug-out? How many of them spent sleepless, frightened nights, ducking shells and shrapnel and machine gun bullets? How many of them parried a bayonet thrust of an enemy? How many of them were wounded or killed in battle?
  Out of war nations acquire additional territory, if they are victorious. They just take it. This newly acquired territory promptly is exploited by the few the selfsame few who wrung dollars out of blood in the war. The general public shoulders the bill.
  And what is this bill?
  This bill renders a horrible accounting. Newly placed gravestones. Mangled bodies. Shattered minds. Broken hearts and homes. Economic instability. Depression and all its attendant miseries. Back-breaking taxation for generations and generations.
  For a great many years, as a soldier, I had a suspicion that war was a racket; not until I retired to civil life did I fully realize it. Now that I see the international war clouds gathering, as they are today, I must face it and speak out.
  Again they are choosing sides. France and Russia met and agreed to stand side by side. Italy and Austria hurried to make a similar agreement. Poland and Germany cast sheeps eyes at each other, forgetting for the nonce [one unique occasion], their dispute over the Polish Corridor.
  The assassination of King Alexander of Jugoslavia [Yugoslavia] complicated matters. Jugoslavia and Hungary, long bitter enemies, were almost at each others throats. Italy was ready to jump in. But France was waiting. So was Czechoslovakia. All of them are looking ahead to war. Not the people not those who fight and pay and die only those who foment wars and remain safely at home to profit.
  There are 40,000,000 men under arms in the world today, and our statesmen and diplomats have the temerity to say that war is not in the making.
  Hells bells! Are these 40,000,000 men being trained to be dancers?
  Not in Italy, to be sure. Premier Mussolini knows what they are being trained for. He, at least, is frank enough to speak out. Only the other day, Il Duce in International Conciliation, the publication of the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace, said:
  And above all, Fascism, the more it considers and observes the future and the development of humanity quite apart from political considerations of the moment, believes neither in the possibility nor the utility of perpetual peace War alone brings up to its highest tension all human energy and puts the stamp of nobility upon the people who have the courage to meet it.
  Undoubtedly Mussolini means exactly what he says. His well-trained army, his great fleet of planes, and even his navy are ready for war anxious for it, apparently. His recent stand at the side of Hungary in the latters dispute with Jugoslavia showed that. And the hurried mobilization of his troops on the Austrian border after the assassination of Dollfuss showed it too. There are others in Europe too whose sabre rattling presages war, sooner or later.
  Herr Hitler, with his rearming Germany and his constant demands for more and more arms, is an...